How To Hookup Online

Last Longer In Bed With One Simple Trick

By: R. Finn

Fantasy football stats. Call of Duty. Lord of the Rings. Every guy has their own go-to mental distraction when he’s trying to last longer during sex.

But there are two flaws to this classic stall tactic:

1) When you’re having sex, you should be enjoying yourself

2) Distracting yourself to avoid pulling the trigger just doesn’t work

Coming too quickly is very often a matter of anxiety, not arousal, says David Rowland, Ph.D., a psychology professor at Valparaiso University. When you feel yourself rapidly approaching climax, you start to worry. And, like a sexual snowball effect, that worrying fires up your nervous system in ways that speed up ejaculation, Rowland explains. To last longer, you need to be calm and not try to stuff it with non-sexual images.

Easier said than done. So how does one do that? The trick is to focus on the awesome sex you’re having. If you’re enjoying the sensations of sex, you won’t be focused on the thought of blowing your load too early. Try and pick out something specific, like your partner’s lips, her breathing, or the movement of her hips or shoulders

Say what? Wouldn’t focusing more on her body and your pleasure send you to a speedier conclusion? As counterintuitive as it sounds, the answer is no. Occupying your brain with sexual thoughts relaxes you and reduces your anxiety, which gives you more staying power. And regardless of what you may think about this strategy, the only way to truly find out if it works for you is to try it.

With that said, there’s only so much your mind can do to slow an oncoming orgasm. So you need to keep tabs on your own excitement levels. If you feel yourself approaching the finish line too soon, recognizing this allows you to “pull back” before it’s too late.

Tell your partner you need to slow down. You can say something to the tune of “You’re so hot. I’m not going to last long if we keep this up.” Then stimulate her orally or manually until the cool air on your tool has calmed down a bit.

“Being upfront in this way shows your partner you’re sexually confident and also that you’re interested in more than your own gratification,” Rowland says. Keep in mind that a sudden absence of intimacy would really make the situation awkward. Even if you finish quickly, sticking around to help your partner get off will ensure the woman’s needs have been met and thus lower the pressure you feel to perform for the next time around.

Also, most men mistakenly equate “good sex” with “long sex” and women just don’t think about it in those terms. Good foreplay and the things you say during and after sex are more important when it comes to her enjoyment.

Do you have your own tricks to hold back that money shot? Let us know below.

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