Overview

Alt.com is one of the largest and oldest Alernative dating and BDSM sites on the internet. If you are into kink or looking to get away from the vanilla bedroom life, Alt.com is worth a visit.

Fifty Shades did me a huge solid favor for me. No I wouldn’t say I was a prude or anything but I sure didn’t know how fun it can get. I’m am single, love men and love casual sex with men. I am exploring being kinkier these days, but the movie let me fully embrace my fantasies. The second movie is coming out soon and I can’t wait to see what new things they are going to introduce. I am not stuck in the movie’s universe it felt good to see this side of life brought to main stream. The book made waves and the first movie solidified its place in society. The second one will be interesting to see how far they will push it and how far I have progressed.

Kink, BDSM, Bondage and Fetish are taboo concepts. My girlfriends wouldn’t know exactly what they are specifically but have ideas about what they are. I am not going to have debates with anyone about what each are, so please take some time to do some personal research. My girlfriends would talk about them superficially, but we never knew exactly how they are different and how extreme they can get. After seeing the movie I made it a point to read up about these concepts and see what the big deal was. At first, stereotypes were the basis of what formed my opinions. I imagined a lady in black leather whipping a guy to extreme pain. That might not be far off, but I wanted to understand the erotic appeal of the whole experience. Looks can be deceiving, when it comes from first impressions. When I suck cock you might think that only my man loves it. Wrong I think I love it more than him. I love the feeling of controlling a man where he is vulnerable. I learned with Alt.com pleasure comes from many different perspectives outside of common conventions.

I randomly typed in “fetish dating” one day into Google. This site caught my interest since it mentioned “Erotic BDSM, Bondage & Fetish Sex Dating for Masters, Mistresses.” Sounded like something I wanted to know more about. The first time I visited Alt.com, it looked like it had all the things I wanted. I wanted to explore BDSM roles, see what fetishes people have and how bondage satisfied people. Sex is so personal in different ways to so many people. People have some many interpretations and opinions about it that it is just too loaded of an issue. I went to the site’s Chat Groups to get answers from people already in the lifestyle. I signed up to access the groups, which make sense, since the topics were risqué. I don’t think they are available to people who don’t sign up. I am sure people would get offended by even seeing some of the active discussion topics.

Honestly who gives a fuck about subscription costs these days. It’s not much, it doesn’t matter what it costs in the grand scheme of things. If you aren’t too sure about how active you will be no worries. You can pay by month, 3 months or year. Just grab a month to start with and see for yourself if this is valuable enough for you. Price is prospectively $30/1 month, $60/4 months and $161/12 months. The best value is the annual because it only breaks down to $9/month. Now they have a Gold and Silver membership. I am not a lawyer. I don’t like reading the stupid details of the difference. At this cheap of a price, it was not worth my time to read about the differences. I always get the higher edition stuff most of the time because it will have everything in the package.

Now I know not everybody is into this lifestyle, but a lot of them started after Fifty Shades came out. I have been told the chatter has been up since the movie came out. In any party, you kind of size up who you want talk to by how relate to you. If they are hot you know where they are. That’s how you start here. Jumping into the Blog section is extremely eye opening. You see the blog creator, the blog title, views and how many people in it. You see a list of the recent blogs, most popular recent blogs, most active recent blogs and member’s personal blogs. I wanted to see if authors would respond to my questions, update me on lingo and teach me a thing or two. Just reading the past posts and comments gave me context, background and indicators if they knew how to communicate, but I need to hear how people really behaved. I was not going to waste time chatting with someone that did not know how to talk to a lady. It is a very anonymous community, so trolls could be anyone. The community was very receptive of me and I felt completely free to ask anyone about anything. I had never seen such provocative pictures in the Photo section. None of these pictures were fake. Wow. There was something a little off about each image, but the imperfection was needed. I wished I could un-see some of the pictures but appreciate that I still saw them. Some of this stuff feels like looking at a train wreck. It can be unsettling but you can’t look away from it for a second.

I thought it was funny that you could give little gifs, or “Bling” to other members on the site. They are little fetish/bdsm snippet videos of interesting topics. My favorite one was of a lady’s hand pushing her pinkie finger deep inside a cock’s urethra. It made me LOL because she went in what looked like a whole inch. I thought the ones where they tie up a guy’s dick like a tail are pretty cool too. Then they slap them and make them bounce back.

When I first joined, I was expecting a wall of dick pictures. Who doesn’t expect that these days. It is as if every guy out there is instructed to do this as soon as they join any dating site. Of course I got a bunch of dick pictures sent to me privately. Amazing! Lets stay focused. What’s the first thing anyone does? You look at pictures first. They will always have dick pics but here they aren’t the main focus of the pictures people post. It seemed like a story they wanted to tell and express what they liked. I would say they were almost like custom business cards rather than just dick pictures. They images with intent were the things I needed to see. Chatting with the submitters was another path I took.

It’s harder to fake images these days. I give it more credibility to pictures than text and emails. Seeing the imperfect is so perfect to me. I enjoyed people’s sharing of their intimate moments. I asked for special images often. People invested in equipment made of leather and metal. There were lots of pictures with handcuffs, whips and leather. People weren’t afraid to show their face at all. It is amazing they felt comfortable and bold to do that on the internet these days. It is funny, so many of these guys were looking for someone to punish them.

It is cool that there is an activity tab called What’s Hot. There are sections for hottest photos, videos, albums, and top members. I have no clue what makes a top member, but I noticed these members post a lot of content for others to see. I guess it is a popularity contest somehow. It was eye opening to see people pose in bondage arrangements and share what they want or will do for others. I guess this kind of stuff transcends text. You have to see it to believe it. Some of the bondage rope knots on a person looked so complicated I do not know how they will get out of it. This lifestyle is non-conventional and you would have to expect images and videos to be the only way to communicate about this complicated activity.

In addition to the member submitted videos there is an option to watch BDSM movies as well. Under the What’s Hot tab there is an option to explore Fetish style adult movies. I am appreciative that it offered only BDSM, Bondage and Fetish based movies. They separated them out into categories, studios and porn stars that I assume are relevant in this lifestyle. They had links to sell sex toys which sounds appropriate. I am a sucker for good deals so I don’t know if they were well priced or just regular MSRP. When I tried to watch a movie they prompted me to pay for it. Either pay for a short time duration stream, actual DVD or download. Whatever works for you folks? Free porn is king these days, but watching exactly what you like though is worth its premium price.

There is a Live Action tab on the site. I was surprised to see real people in front of a cam. They were dressed in leather with their BDSM toys behind them. It was fun chatting with a few of them. Since they were live people I was shocked they actually responded back to my questions. It felt like I was immediately in their world. They highlighted some members as top broadcasters. I guess a lot of people invest a lot of time here.

Other chatting options were the Flash Chat, Adult Chat Rooms and Instant Messenger options. The instant messenger worked like any other IM tool. It listed others who were on and listed how far away they were from you. It listed the member’s age, location and screen name. It’s funny how people’s screen names describe some aspect of themselves. The Adult Chat Rooms are traditional chat threads you jump on to. You have to scroll through a few to decide what you want to join. I would have to say it is a little confusing here since the layout is not entirely intuitive. I obviously left to avoid a headache. The Flash Chat is an ongoing group chat. Tons of users are all on a chat thread and people are just commenting continuously. I didn’t find this one particularly focused and didn’t learn much. It felt like this was much more of a community sharing tool. Many folks talk about non-BDSM type of comments. I didn’t spend much time in this chatting tool.

Fifty Shades might have been my light introduction into the BDSM experience but reading blogs and exploring Alt.com Groups and Stories helped me comprehend the psyche of the lifestyle. Understanding what inspires a man or woman to share themselves in kinky behavior lets you understand their tolerances in life. Understanding boundaries helped me understand what people can be comfortable with despite normal conventions prescribing otherwise.

In Hawaii North shore the locals hate tourist surfers who don’t respect the local surfing culture and etiquette. If you cut in line for the swells you get punched out and your board gets smashed on the beach. Now folks don’t smash you here, but fair warning to those who have only seen the Fifty Shades movie to not be a little shit. I am part of the mix too but I have been learning the ways for a bit. Please prove being new does not mean being dumb. I’ve hosted a few partners through the community and know the rules of behavior now. They’ve helped me learn the ropes to say the least.

I would say Alt.com is a dating site for adults into unconventional concepts of pleasure. The mindset is not the white picket fence dream. We aren’t here for that and don’t expect it. I think this site is best at connecting new adults into the BDSM lifestyle. You will meet some nice adults that can teach you about the whole experience. They love fresh meat. You can learn what it means to enjoy the gift of pain or eroticism from new aspects of life. You can gain knowledge from many sources on the internet and media, but meeting people with similar interests is the only real way to find what you like. This can only happen by meeting them where they hang out.

Final Verdict:

ALT.com is easily the best BDSM site I've seen, no matter what your experience level. I can see myself having lots of fun here.